Hug a Bear - NOT!
No offense meant to all the bear-loving gay guys but I have never been a fan of THE hairy back. Or hairy shoulders. OR, truth be told, a bushy “down-south”. Guys have to have more than one degree of separation from the banana-eaters down the Minnesota zoo!
If I have to shave my legs-and-everything-else-considered, my man had better learn the art of ’scaping all the right places. Sure some women like bearded men, men with moustache, even scraggly goatees, but nose hair poking out like tiny sensors, no thank you.
Heather Estay, author of It’s Never Too Late to Look Hot says, “Back, shmack — the absolutely grossest ‘hairea’ on the male body is inside the ears and nostrils! A sexy tongue placed into a hairy ear is as appealing as licking a well-used hairbrush.”
And yet, this is an extremely touchy subject to bring up with your guy, right next to, honey, your dentures need cleaning. You don’t want to hurt his feelings by telling him you just have to fantasize about Dr. House examining you barechested whenever you shag so you can blot out images of his hairy butt.
So it’s not fair to be mean and bitchy about your really nice boyfriend-except-his shoulders look like Big Foot’s furry back. Hairiness is afterall, entirely natural in men (women too, but we’ve lost that battle decades ago). But, aesthetics do count when species chose their mates, in my case, hairy butts are a no-no.
So I salute men who brave the salon and go under the laser beam for the love of their women AND being barechested with dignity.
The other day I came across a website promoting Phillips Bodygroom-er, http://www.shaveeverywhere.com, the ultimate shaving tool for men I almost fell off my chair laughing. They’re saying that a well-groomed “woo-hoo” will give any man an added “optical inch”. Trust a company to know how to sell a man-product. And trust a man to shave if it gives him an optical inch where he thinks it matters the most.
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